Why I Hate You and You Hate Me by H. Berke Joseph;

Author:H. Berke, Joseph;
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Taylor & Francis Group

CHAPTER SIX

On attacking masculinity: penis greed

The phallus is the embodiment of masculine creativity, just like the womb is the powerhouse of female creativity. The phallus, of course, is the male member. But it also refers to an idea or image of the penis. It denotes both the physical and the symbolic qualities of maleness.

An intense longing for male qualities, functions, and status features in many cultures, but in this century Freud drew special attention to phallic wishes during the course of describing the development of female sexuality. He observed that at a certain stage in their lives the physical interests of children shift away from the mouth and anus to the genitals. Then the little girl discovers what she lacks and passionately desires the missing part: “The discovery that she is castrated is a turning-point in a girl’s growth … Her self-love is mortified by the comparison with the boy’s far superior equipment” (Freud, 1933a, op. cit., p. 126); and “She makes her judgment and her decision in a flash. She has seen it and knows that she is without it and wants to have it” (Freud, 1925j, p. 252).

Freud called the sudden shocking awareness of absent maleness and the wish to overcome it, penis envy. Related to the castration complex or the masculine complex, this term (and attendant assumptions) has achieved a prominent place in the psychological literature and popular parlance. But I believe it is a misnomer, and as generally used, perpetuates several misconceptions.

The classical concept of penis envy has little to do with envy. On the contrary it conveys intense admiration, emulation, and identification for all things masculine. It is a wish, first for a penis, then for a penis in intercourse, and finally for a penis substitute, such as a baby. Hence I think a more appropriate term for these feelings is “penis greed”. This signifies an insatiable desire, both by boys and by girls, for the male member and all the perks and privileges that seem to accompany it.1

I know it’s not true, but I’m like a lot of men. Even when we know better, we feel deep down that “the bigger your cock, the more of a man you are”. (A male informant quoted in Penny, 1981, pp. 29–30)

When one has it, one has everything, one feels protected, nothing can touch you … one is what one is, and the others can only follow you and admire you … it is absolute power. (A female informant quoted by Torok, 1970, p. 139)

… it has always been like this for me. As though, only man was fit to fulfill himself, to have opinions, to go always further. And everything to him is so naturally easy … nothing, nothing can stop him. (Another female informant, ibid., p. 139)

What have you been doing all summer?

Growing a penis! (Reply by the female protagonist, Brenda, in Roth, 1959, p. 128)

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